Late Night.

It's midnight and he just left and I miss him.  He has to get up early for a business meeting tomorrow.  I told him to go home, so he wouldn't get stuck in the awful traffic into the city in the morning.  I wish he didn't have such a early meeting, I'm not working tomorrow and I want to just snuggle with him.

I think back on tonight and it was great.

He came over with Thai and we ate.  After we turned the tv on and we sat on the couch.  I got sucked into the tv and time came for the commercials, I turned to him and he was just looking at me.

I furrow my eyebrows and say "What?"
"Nothing, you're beautiful." He says, and I blush.
He leans in to kiss me and I let him.  At the same time he turns the tv off.
"Very smooth, sir."
"Sir?" He says, sounding surprised. 
"Yes, Sir."
"Oh, you want to play?"
I smirked and he knew my answer. 

I know I told him that I'm fine and he should go home, he was wary and gave me that I-don't-believe-you look.  But he went because I practically pushed him out the door.  And now, I'm feeling very lonely and vulnerable.  Maybe I'll call him...

As I pick up my phone to call him, he calls me.

I answer, "Hey."

"Hey.  I just got home.  I wanted to let you know and I wanted to know if you're okay.  How are you right now?" He says, sounding concerned.

"I'm okay." I give a short reply.

"Hmm, babe, are you telling me what I want to hear or how you really feel?"  He questions my reply.

I sigh. "I'm telling you what you want to hear, okay? I was okay when you left and I didn't want you to drive so early tomorrow to beat the traffic.  I thought I'd be fine.  But I really would like to be cuddling with you... I'm coming down hard.  I just needed to hear your voice and I was about to call when you did.  Since I talked to you, I'll be fine." I say as tear well up in my eyes.

"No, it's not okay.  You're upset.  I hear it in your voice.  Which means you're not fine.  I shouldn't have left after that long session."  He says.

As I hold back my tears, I manage to say. "I am, but I'll be okay.  It's late and you have to get up early. I'm gunna go.  G'night."

He barely gets in a good night, and I hang up.  A second later the waterworks start.  I lay on my bed and form a circle of pillows around me, burying my face into a pillow.  A while later, as my tears and sobs subside, my phone vibrates.

It takes me a couple minutes but I open my text and it's from him. "I'm outside.  Buzz me in."  I'm dazed and confused.  I can't be reading this right.  It's 2 in the morning, he can't be standing outside right now.  I stand up and look outside and he's standing there waiting for me.  I buzz him in.

He knocks and I get up to open the door.  My hair is a mess and I have a tear-streaked face, I can't believe I'm answering the door for him right now.  As soon as I open the door, he hugs me and the tears start to fall again.

I try to say "Why are you here? You have work in a couple of hours." but I'm not to sure he understood between the hiccups and crying.

"I knew you would be like this.  I shouldn't have left."  He whispers in my ear as he's hugging me.  "Besides, it's a video conference.  So I brought my laptop so I can do the meeting here and I'll spend the rest of the day with you."

I look at him and think "What did I do to deserve such a good man?"  Instead I say, "You can't just not go to work because of me.  You have a job to do. I don't even know why you came.  I said I would be fine.  You never listen to me."  He looks surprised.  To be fair I'm surprised I said that, maybe something is eating at me.

"Actually I can do what I want, I do not answer to you.  Plus I have 3 weeks of PTO accrued.  I could have cancelled my meeting too but I didn't because it was a headache to find a time that worked for all of us.  And you do know why I came, you're a wreck and you can't deny it.  So I am choosing to be with you tomorrow, whether you like it or not."  He says calmly.

Tears start to fall again and he wipes them away with his thumbs.  I manage to say "I'm sorry, thanks for coming."

"I know." he says "Now, it's late, let's go to bed."

We lay down and I cuddle up against him and within minutes I fall asleep.